Do More Than Exist

NY resolution

“You keep waiting for the moral of your life to become obvious, but it never does. Work, work, work: No moral. No plot. No eureka! Just production schedules and days. You might as well be living inside a photocopier.” That’s what Douglas Coupland said in Player One: What is to Become of Us.

And he’s right. 2015 is upon us and here we are again, looking for the best way to make ourselves and our lives better. The majority of our New Years “Resolutions”  cover the realm of weight loss and healthy eating, saving a little more money, calling home a little more often or maybe even a better balance of work and play -however those scales may be tipped. The little things we make big things that we are sure will ensure perfection. Shortly, our Facebook News Feed will be inundated with ‘Tips & Tricks for a Better You.” Sure, there is something great about starting with a fresh slate, a clean calendar that no one has written on, no mistakes yet engraved on the concrete tombstone for 2015. How refreshing! I would be lying if I said I hadn’t succumbed to the excitement as well.

I’ve had no qualms about sharing my own personal journey in discovering myself, particularly in the last year, which has been about as smooth as trying to chew rocks. Between the unknowns and the ‘oops, I shouldn’t have done that” moments, I’m well equipped to write a book on how NOT to do just about everything. (But we all are, and I like that.) Earlier this month, I left an excellent-paying job, with benefits! where I was making more than what’s adequate for someone my age. I left without a plan (seems to be a life trend lately) because I wasn’t fulfilled. I was just ‘there.’ And I knew that change wasn’t going to knock unless I brought change to the door. So, when the knock at the door came, I opened it and left. (I sort of left through a window, but that’s a different story for a different day.)

So, what does this have to do with the New Year? Nothing, really. I mentioned the story about quitting my job above because it made me realize I would rather ‘still be looking’ for my purpose than spend my days doing something I know isn’t my passion. Because I was sick of my own excuses as to why I couldn’t do what I really wanted to do. Because I could sit in a glass office all day watching the world go by knowing that other people are doing their own version of what is ‘good’ and I was just a factory of one liners about ‘not the right time’, ‘not the right finances’, ‘not the right people’.

But nothing ever comes at the right time. And if it did, would you know it?

When evaluating how you’re going to do better this year, the weight loss benchmarks and the healthy eating shenanigans are all impossible good goals, but that isn’t what life is about. Life isn’t all about your occupation and neither is this blog. You could say this about who you’re dating, or loving, or your hobbies, or lack thereof, or the example you’re showcasing for your children. Because every day is a clean slate and you can start over whenever you want. You can change directions when you don’t like the scenery. You can shift gears when rocks are jumbled in the engine. Or something. There are no excuses. So why wouldn’t you? Why wouldn’t you plan to change the world a little bit every day? Why wouldn’t your plan be utopian? Seems like anything short of that that you actually attain would be pretty satisfying.

Ask yourself what your purpose is for today. Why are you here? How are you going to make a difference? What have you been fearing, yet yearning to do? Will you do more than just exist this year? Will you do more than exist for the day? Or is it just another photocopy?

“The purpose of life is a life with a purpose, so I’d rather die for a cause than live a life that is worthless.” – Immortal Technique


1 thought on “Do More Than Exist

  1. Ciara Rubin

    Hey Jessica!
    We met at the Women Who Walk the Walk luncheon last Octobe, we sat at the same table. I am currently a recently woken up ex-liberal/apathetic who voted for Obama twice. I feel it’s important for me to share my shame in that to show the amazing (scary, heartbreaking, rage inducing, but lately hopeful) journey I’ve been on since waking up to what is really going on in our country and the world. Oh, and giving a damn about it.

    I’ve been following and liking your posts on Facebook for some time now, but this entry really hits home for me. I’ve always been the kind of person who wanted to chase my purpose through passion, and for a log time let others tell me I was lost and didn’t have my ‘shit together.’ Thank you for sharing your journey and for being so open and vulnerable in doing so.

    I want to make my 2015 as meaningful, passionate, and purposeful as I can. I’m terrified of what damage will be done to our Constitution in 2015 but I realize that ultimately I can only control how I encounter the world and the people in it. I want to make 2015 the year when I can shed my fear and start waking people up through hope, love, and facts. Thank you for the inspiration, and the push in the right direction.
    Hope to meet you again soon!


Have something to say?

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s